"I think I'm Big Meech/Larry Hoover...."

I was reading a blog I frequent when I came across an interesting question. A popular nineties rapper, who shall remain nameless, is completely dumbfounded by the success of William Roberts BKA Rick Ross. He doesn't understand how a correctional officer turned rapper can lie about his drug lifestyle and still be a number one selling artist who raps about, well...dealing drugs. I will try to answer his question in this blog post.

To begin, most people who listen to music, especially secular rap music, with its women, cars, parties, drugs and other decadence, haven't really experienced the thrills of the lifestyle. Even still, we rap right along with Baby when he boasts about "big mansions," and Drake when he brags about "champagne showers," and yes, even with Rick Ross when he proclaims to the world that he is on the same level as the one time mastermind of a multi million dollar drug ring. 

Rap gives us a reason to nod our heads and and opportunity to live vicariously through the hyper masculinity and/or overt sexuality presented by the artists. We download the songs, preview the albums or keep our stations locked to the local Hip Hop radio stations, waiting for the 4 or 5 minutes that we can get away. 

I vividly remember listening to Dead Prez during my freshmen year of college while getting ready for class every morning. A friend put me on to them during my senior year of high school and I never looked back until after the Lord called me several years later. They had an infectious and conscience rap hit out at the time, titled Hip Hop. Not familiar with Dead Prez? Well, to put it bluntly, they are a militant rap group with ties to Pan Africanism and the Black Panther Party. On one hand, they rapped about discipline and intellectualism. They even had a cool take on Orwell's Animal Farm called Animal in Man. On the other hand, the also rapped about the overthrow of the U.S. government and, get this, the futility of attending public schools and universities. Isn't it Ironic? Let's Get Free let me be the angry, rebellious woman I was afraid to be and I loved it. Did I love it enough to quit college, join a commune and become a vegan? NOPE. Truth is, I wasn't a revolutionary. I just played one in front of the mirror of my second floor dorm room. 

This fact didn't stop a condescending smirk from forming on my lips when I saw a car of blondes riding in a drop top convertible singing Trick Daddy's I'm A Thug about a year later. What on earth did they know about being a thug or being discriminated against for having the sad misfortune of being poor and black? Well, they knew about as much about it as I knew when I was 11 years old, singing "Rolling down the street/Smoking endo/Sippin' on Gin and Juice"--absolutely nothing.

In short, rap music for most people is primarily entertainment. Pure escapism. It's always been this way, but I think the rapper who originally posed the question has forgotten this. We all forget this sometimes. I understand that there are people who enjoy these songs and actually engage in the behavior discussed in the lyrics. They really are out shooting people, getting high everyday and being super promiscuous. The rest of us are just looking for a temporary thrill and a dope beat.

There are other aspects of this phenomenon which could and should be examined, but it's getting late.

Peace.

Disclaimer: This is just a social commentary. I'm not advocating the purchase or support of any of the music/artists listed above. (Should I really have to type this??) *sigh*

Facebook characters

I've been on Facebook since 2005. I've seen interesting characters emerge in this time. Below is a list of the most notable.

1. The Hated: These people are ALWAYS being hated on. I can never really understand why, but each day they post another rant about people hating on them and their life achievements. Whether it be their recent purchase of a '97 Pontiac Grand Am or finishing up their degree at Everest College, haters just don't want to see them living large.
2. The Random Capitalization Crew: The rules are capitalization are quite easy. Always use a capital letter when writing/typing proper nouns and the first word of sentences. The RCCs don't respect these rules and for this they must die (or be hidden). Nothing is quite as annoying as scrolling down my news feed only to see a status message tYpeD LiKe THis. Why do people do this? It's much more difficult to type this way. It's unnatural and hard on the eyes. 
3. The Three Namers: Okay. I don't use my real name on Facebook. Why? Well, because I already have my face in over 100 pictures. Call me crazy, but I think pairing my name and my face on the internet is asking for problems in the future. Many Facebook fans have chosen to use their real names and many women include their maiden and married names to avoid confusion and to assist others in finding them in searches. When I think of the "three namers" I think of people like: John Morethanjustanoption Smith, Tanisha QueenBee Hall, and Andre BigThangsPoppin Holloway. My message to them. Please stop.
4. The Wise Old Owls: These are the Facebook friends who put up like 10 cliched quotes a day about success. They have the answers to all of life's problems...and if they don't, they know a dead person who does. 
5. The Likers: They've never seen a page, group, photo album or status message they didn't disagree with. They people "like" about 50 things a day. They even like their own status message updates. They're a happy, simple people. Easy to please.
6. The Gamers: Ever looked to the left side of your home page and noticed that you have 74  game requests? Thank the gamers. Whether it's Farmville, Mafia Wars or Sorority Life, these Facebook friends live to play, especially during the hours of 8 a.m. and 5 p.m. So...don't be rude. Go help them on their farm, join their gang or become a member of their sorority...or...just do what I do and ignore most of the requests (unless it's Family Feud #judgeme)
7. The Theologians:  They read Spurgeon, Packer, Macarthur and Piper. They ponder the implications of Christ's atonement. They study the Protestant Reformation all day long. They are the theologians. Always ready with a relevant Bible verse, they fill your feed with nuggets notes and thoughts from their daily devotions. They also post hymn lyrics.... Actually beneficial most days.
8. The Models: You love them. You hate them. You know they have seahorses on their shower curtains due to all the bathroom mirror shots they've posted. You are familiar with their entire wardrobe. You know the interior of their car is gray leather. They fill your news feed with at least 5-10 mobile uploads a day. They've perfected the duck lips and they know they look best when photographed from the left side. #hateisawastedemotion
9. The Randoms: They rarely post new status messages and when they do, it's always something random like: "I'm hungry" or "Just saw a squirrel on a trashcan eating a lifesaver" or "Ligers>Tigons". 
10. The News Reporters: They give you the latest on topics ranging from sports to politics. Love them or hate them, you wouldn't know half of what you know without them. You don't need a newspaper if you have at least 5 reporters on your friends list.

That's all I've got, but I'm sure more exist.

"....that you may KNOW..."

My pastor is currently doing sermons on a range of requested topics until we get into our next book study (2 Timothy?). The last two were especially invigorating to me due to my current spiritual state/challenges. The topics were "Assurance" and "Christian Liberty"


I don't have my notes on me, but I'd like to suggest 1 John for anyone struggling with assurance. He gave us five points from the text so that we who "... believe in the name of the Son of God...may know" (1Jn 5:13) we have eternal life. He warned us not to look at these points as things to do to earn eternal life, but rather to see if these things were present in our lives. Four of the points were as follows, if I'm remembering correctly.

1. Growing intolerance/enmity for the world (not the physical earth, but rather all cultural/societal world views that defy and/or seek to replace God and the law of God). 1 Jn. 2:15 and following
2. Growing aversion to sin. 1 Jn. 3:1-10
3. Love of the brethren/fellow brothers and sisters in the faith (not just in word but in deed). 1 Jn. 3:11 and following
4. Desire to glorify God through practice of avoid sin/keeping commandments. 1 Jn. 5:1-5

I'm sure the last one must be faith in the person and work of the biblical Christ (outlined in 1 Jn. 2:18-25, 5:6-12), but I'm unsure.

So then, if we see this fruit in our lives, we can have some assurance that we've been born again. If we do not see this fruit we can still, as long as we have breath in our lungs, throw ourselves at the mercy of God (if we've actually realized our need for Christ's sacrifice, his holiness and our utter sinfulness). Funny how even in challenging us to examine ourselves, God still offers us mercy and grace through Christ. That's good news.

I really did love how he stressed that DOING these things doesn't earn salvation. Still figuring things out, learning things and seeking to understand God's grace. 

Anyway this was written in haste, so please excuse any typos...

God be with you.

All the time we've got is all the time we've got...

I attended a funeral yesterday. I wrote the following as I waited for the ceremony to begin.

Smiling faces. At a funeral. Someone took her last breath a week ago and people are smiling. Heads are turning. Seeing who's in attendance, checking out clothing and hair. Sizing each other up. A reunion of sorts for some. Wooden chairs in a rundown high school auditorium. Voices from the intercom make announcements for the living. It's not somber enough. Quiet enough. Respectful enough. I want to cry. She wasn't my best friend. She wasn't a friend at all. A mere associate, turned acquaintance, turned stranger. Haven't even seen her in 5 or 6 years. Can't say my eyes burned with tears when I heard about it. Feeling was one more of shock. Speculated about attending. Wanted to give those closest to her privacy. But here I sit in a hard wooden chair next to a three year singing "Happy Birthday" to himself with the buzzy murmuring of 50 conversations about season finale's, the songs on the radio and some woman who braids hair. No mourning. No tears. Just jaws chewing gum. Giggling and murmuring. I want to cry for her. I feel a rush of emotion surging through me. I feel the familiar sensation of warmth blurring my vision as I write. I want to stand up and shush everyone. Someone chuckles about another's absence. "She told me she was coming," says one. "She lie," the other responds. More chuckling. More mundane talk from the living. No brevity allowed. Just gum smacking and silly talk. It's hitting me. I wondering how closely this gathering mirrors my eventual funeral. I'm sick. Just cremate me.

Nothing like a funeral to make you ponder death and all it's implications. They brought the body in about 30 minutes after my arrival. The entire tone changed as we rose watched the pall bearers carry her in encased in a shiny white casket with a colorful bouquet securely fixed on top. I was glad.

I pictured her face, usually smiling, now flat and humorless, laying in the dark box and came close to tears again. Her family immediately after. I pictured myself at the funeral of my best friend/husband and the room blurred. I saw myself crying in the front row, fainting, vomiting in despair in shock.

There was singing, tears and even laughter are people gave remarks on how she touched their lives. It still didn't seem real to me and still doesn't seem real to me. I sat there wondering at times why I couldn't cry specifically about her death. She was a nice girl. A good girl. A beautiful girl. A young girl. Perhaps it's because I feel it's possible that she's with Christ. Perhaps it's because I didn't think I had the right to cry for her--like only those who loved her best should weep. I have no idea. I can be a leaky bucket of tears. Then it dawned on me that I hardly cry when one should cry. I didn't cry when my great grandmother's brother died, or when my grandmother's sister died, or when an older cousin died. But I've cried reading stories of abused children, or at the sight of stray dogs and even this morning when my husband informed me that he'd be away until about 10 p.m. or 11 p.m. today. I find it strange. I guess I could analyze it, but frankly it's too early to be that introspective.

Work prevented me from staying to hear the eulogy, but I'm glad I attended. It's the first funeral I ever attended alone and maybe only the fifth I've ever attended in my life. I'm glad I was reminded of her life and her energy. "All the time you've got, is all the time you've got...and in time, all your time will stop."

Insomniac ramble

1. 2+2=5
2. A video of  Waka Flocka Flame is in heavy rotation on many blogs and Facebook newsfeeds due to his less than intelligent answers to questions regarding education and voting. I want to laugh but it's not funny. I watched the video and felt bad for him...and for the YBY.  I don't mean this in a condescending way either. I REALLY feel bad for him that people are calling this dude an idiot and pretty much using him as a means to feel better about themselves. It appears that Terrance knew he was going into unknown territory with Mr. Flocka, as did Rocsi, which explains why she threw her head back in laughter when the interview turned "serious." Click here if you like watching train wrecks.
3. Recently discovered that Bible Gateway allows you to type in a passage to be read aloud in almost every translation. I may be late, but it's super cool. Check it out.
4. Warren is running his first 5K tomorrow. I should jack him up for doing one of my 101 Things (remember that? I'm still working on it! Ha!)
5. A "scaled down" version of my 10 year high school reunion is still on. #ohletsdoit
6. To Die is Gain is still probably one of the best rap albums I've ever heard. Stephen the Levite's flow is kinda ridiculous.
7. Speaking of CHH, I haven't bought a new album in a minute. Heard the single from Trip's album and pretty much passed it up. Think the same is going to happen with Lecrae's new joint. We do have Sho's second album. It was cool for the most part. Heard about A Yellow Man the other day. They have me excited again. I definitely want to branch out once I get other things settled.
8. Been listening to Line of Fire lately to give myself a break from Fighting For the Faith. FFTF is an apologetics show at it's core, and sometimes it can be a bit much. Might be time to retire all these radio shows and hit up Sermon Audio and TPC Sermons. 
9. Lies My Pastor Told Me. No, I'm not talking about my pastor. I'm talking about an eBook available for download that addresses 15 of the most popular church cliches of the day. Read it if you dare. Totally free.
10. Found out a woman I went to college with died yesterday at a dialysis appointment. It's still kinda surreal. We weren't close by any means, but we did work together for a couple of summers...even stepped together for 2 years during our freshmen and sophomore years. Never know when your time is up. "Oh Lord, make me know my end and what is the measure of my days; let me know how fleeting I am. Behold, you have made my days a few headbreaths and my lifetime is as nothing before you. Surely all mankind stands as a mere breath...." RIP Frances.
11. Why am I still awake?

One Hundred Thousand Trillion

1. Had the opportunity to catch the tail end of a coaches clinic at my alma mater thanks to hubby. Watched some cool plays and got the basketball season itch. Excited.
2. Spoke to a former caller on the phone today. Says she hates her new job. Put in her resignation today. Life after college is hard. lol...
3. Need some eyeglasses! Sooooo badly. Was supposed to go price frames today but those plans fell by the wayside. Grrrr.
4. Saw The Expendables today. Glad was caught it for matinee prices. More explosions than a little bit. C- at best.
5. Someone please come twist my hair! My locs days are numbered. I want my fro back. lol...*sigh*
6. Had a great few days of training this past week. New kids look good. Only time will tell.
7. So...Willow Smith has a song out. Jay-Z has signed her. What talent did this nine year old display that caught his attention, you ask? Say the following aloud in a high pitched voice: "I whip my hair back and forth." Now repeat that phrase for three minutes and 16 seconds with a few other adlibs and "haterisms". Add auto-tune and a really hot beat. Rinse, Repeat. Or...just click this link.
8. I really want a Pop Tart right now.
9. Facebook is a friend to the vain and an enemy to the covetous.
10. I think I need to take a break from the following: FightingForTheFaith, Facebook, Youtube and all messageboards. Yes...I think I will.
11. I've fallen off the "working out" bandwagon, but plan on getting back into the routine on Monday.
12. There are people in this world who will suck the life out of you if you let them. Run away.
13. All the cool kids hang out on tumblr. Don't believe me? Go over there! Thing is, I don't GET tumblr. LOL. I created an account and could never figure out how to use it...
14. Speaking of tumblr...their taglines is "....the easiest way to share yourself." Thinking about this brings to mind the concept of internet identity. I was browing tumblr the other day in amazement. I mean...is anyone really that cool or interesting...or mysterious. I really asked myself this. For example, I stumbled upon the tumbleblog of this chic named "Kesh." Follow the link if you're interested (be careful as she likes to pose nude), but I found myself wondering what this chick does during the day. Does she have a job? Who are her parents? What is her family background? Did she go to college? Why is she taking these pictures? Why are they so intriguing? So weird? So vulgar? I mean...who is this broad? LOL...How does someone become her? Like, what has to happen in your brain to produce the ideas behind her photography and personal style? I wondered the same as I browsed Facebook today. Saw some pictures that a FB friend was tagged in. She was an this SUPER ELABORATE bridal shower....as I looked at the detail, the clothing of the guests, the cakes, the gifts, I wondered to myself..."who are these people?" I can't quite explain it...the internet, art, photography have a way of altering reality, making life seem less ordinary and making people seem more interesting...it's really cool and kinda sad in a way. #Justthoughts
15. My dogs need food. Off to WalMart. *poof*

So...about that...

So...about that class reunion in October that I was pumped about.

 I received an e-mail today informing me that it's been canceled due to "low participation."

The brief convo to the left happened after I mentioned the cancellation in my status message.  Boooo I say...BOOOOOO!

My main question is why someone who told me directly that she didn't want to attend because of "wahh wahhh wahhhhh" is asking why it's cancelled...Puzzles me. There are some who really CAN'T come. I don't know what to make of those who live within an hour (or worse yet, in Hinesville) and plan on staying home.

I don't have much else to say about this aside from the fact that I hope those of us who wanted to go will still come together for a small but very spirited gathering...

There's actually a guy who's booked his flight from California to attend yet it was those who are a stone's throw away who pretty much broke up the party. They are lame. I hope they read this...

#thatisall